"LET'S LAUGH AT CHANGE!"
Here's a quote by Frankie Boyle;
Things that would change the atmosphere at a party : I hope no - one is allergic to nuts .... because I like to rest mine on the table / Help yourselves to Nibbles .... he was our favorite hamster but its what he would have wanted.
How about a quote by Steve Harvey;
Comedians walk out, get a feel for the crowd. If it's not going good, we change directions. If we got to drag your momma into this thing, we will. Whatever we got to do.
Let's not forget Jeff Foxworthy;
You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!
And how can we forget Steve Martin;
I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87.
What's that Steven Wright;
The sign said "eight items or less". So I changed my name to Les.